


this cannot be happening

by oh_no_what_plot



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Gen, I Don't Even Know, Possession, hope you like it, it's an idea i came up with in the middle of the night
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:40:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27581498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oh_no_what_plot/pseuds/oh_no_what_plot
Summary: voldemort takes things to a whole new level, manipulating the playing field and changing the stakes and - well, basically possessing a teenager. the only problem? he's really, really bad at it.
Relationships: ??????? - Relationship, Draco Malfoy & Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy & Voldemort, kind of? - Relationship
Comments: 4
Kudos: 15





	this cannot be happening

**Author's Note:**

> bmc au anyone?

“My Lord,” said Snape, tone bland as always. “What do you need us to do?”

Seated at the head of the shadowy table, his fingers gently turning the wand is his hands, Tom Marvolo Riddle - better known as Lord Voldemort - chuckled lowly. Nobody else at the table laughed, though the woman to his right smirked widely despite likely not knowing the plan. Riddle leaned forwards and pointed at Malfoy. The older male one.

“Tell me, Lucius,” he said, his voice a gleeful hiss, “how close is your son to my enemies?”

The younger Malfoy - Riddle did not bother with his name as of yet - paled.

“He goes to the same school,” Lucius replied quietly, and Riddle could sense the fear and dread entwined within his mind. It fueled his pleasure.

“Hmm. Boy, are you committed to this cause?” he said to the child, who froze up. “Answer!”

“Yes,” the newest Death Eater stammered. “Do you - do you want me to spy for you?”

“Better!” Riddle cackled, proud of the shivers he incited in at least half of his members. “You will be the perfect candidate for my little plan.”

“What plan?” Narcissa - the female Malfoy - asked, her voice almost sharp. Riddle had never understood mothers, and their odd defiance. It had been dangerous the last time he fell, and he should be careful it wouldn’t be this time.

“Listen closely…” he said instead.

\---

Draco Malfoy was annoyed. Yes, he was also absolutely terrified and wished he had run away rather than staying for the rest of that meeting, but mostly he was very, very irritated. Why  _ him _ ? Sure, he had been strutting up and down, boasting of his closeness to the dark lord, but… this felt a little  _ too _ close.

“Now, now, boy, don’t forget that I can hear your thoughts,” said Voldemort, and Draco almost jumped. The only thing stopping him from doing so was his current predicament. “Be quiet and only speak when I instruct you to. Is that understood?”

Mentally, Draco agreed - not that he could physically do so. He still hadn’t figured out a way to speak at all, only think loudly and hope that Voldemort would hear him. Until just moments ago, he had been ignored each time.

“Now then, to the train,” Voldemort said, and Draco watched with horror as his body was maneuvered over to the barrier between Platforms 9 and 10. “Is this the same as the usual method?”

Draco had not yet figured out how to communicate clearly, so he just stayed quiet, keeping his thoughts quiet and focusing on the other people at the station. With a deep sigh, Voldemort stepped up to the wall and walked on through.

“There, that wasn’t so hard, now, was it?” he muttered, this time a lot less loudly due to the thick crowds that were filling the smoky platform. “Now the more difficult part -  _ people _ .”

As Voldemort maneuvered their (currently shared) body through the crowds and onto the train, Draco desperately tried to take some control back. Maybe if he could just wave, or make himself trip up, or -

**No use doing that, boy. This spell is stronger than a mere child’s power.**

_ I’m not a child, _ Draco tried to say - well, think.

**Insolent boy, stay quiet.**

“Draco!” called Pansy from somewhere out of his peripheral vision. She was ignored by Voldemort, not even acknowledged.

Right.

So Voldemort didn’t even know his first name.

***

As it turned out, the first person who Voldemort acknowledged was MacMillan. The other prefect had looked over at him and frowned, addressing him using his surname and asking enquiring after why he was not heading to the prefects’ carriage.

Voldemort had simply glared and moved on, but it was  _ something _ .

While Draco had planned to boast his new status this year, an event he had been preparing for for many afternoons in his mirror, it seemed that the dark lord had other plans. Draco watched helplessly as his body was taken up and down the coaches in search of Potter, wishing that this was not happening.

_ Why him? _ , he attempted to say.  _ That’s out of character for me, they’ll notice! _

**Again with pointless questions. Do you wish for this body back or not?**

That shut Draco up.

Eventually, inevitably, they arrived at a mostly empty carriage and saw Potter sitting alone inside. Voldemort stepped up to the bespeckled boy. “I will be sitting here for the duration of this journey.”

“Wh - Malfoy?” he asked, confused. “Is this a joke?”

“No.” Voldemort sat down opposite him, glaring right at him, and Draco facepalmed internally. No social skill.

“Alright - I’ll just -” Harry stood up, clearly thinking this was some attempt to take his carriage. “See you. Or not? Hopefully not.”

But, just as he was reaching for his luggage, Voldemort reached out a hand to stop him. “No. You must stay.”

Harry gaped at him. “Are you okay? Did someone curse you or something?”

And then the most extraordinary thing happened.

Draco sensed Voldemort straining to do  _ something _ , flexing his facial muscles into an unfamiliar position. Oh  _ Merlin  _ \- he was trying to give a genuine smile, wasn’t he?

_ I’ve never smiled at Potter before, except smirking perhaps. _

**Make this your first time.**

_ Please don’t do this. _

**Silence.**

“…Malfoy, are you… smiling?” Harry asked, still looking slightly spooked. “You have been hexed, haven’t you?”

“I have not. It is simply good to see a friend,” Voldemort said, the words sounding foreign in Draco’s voice. “Harry Potter.”

_ We’re not friends! And that sounded creepy! _

**Did you not say you are classmates?**

_ That doesn’t mean we’re friends! _

**No charm, I see.**

_ What does that mean?! _

Voldemort did not answer, simply staring at Potter. Maybe it was this insistence which led to the other teen sliding down back into his seat, eyes wide and expression bewildered.

“Ohh-kay.” He fidgeted for a few minutes, before eventually asking, “What prompted this change?”

“Is it not good to make friends?” Voldemort asked, and Draco wanted to hit his head against a brick wall.

***

Within hours, Voldemort had managed to terrorise Longbottom with kindness and confused Potter even more than usual. A blonde who was also seemingly friends with Potter - Luna Lovegood, they learned - had given him a look and smiled almost knowingly.

“Voldemort is ever drawing near,” she said lightly. “Don’t you think, Harry?”

“Uh, sure,” the boy with the scar sad nervously, glancing over at Draco.

Once they arrived, they reunited with Weasley and Granger, and Draco was relieved to note that Voldemort had decided to pursue Draco’s usual Slytherin friends. He did his best to guide him through  _ not  _ ruining all of his connections, though clearly they had noticed a change, and generally considered the whole process relatively successful. Eating dinner that evening, Draco waited through hours of Voldemort reminiscing and going over his plot.

This was going to get tiring quickly, but it wouldn’t be so bad… right?

***

Some part of Draco was glad that Potter and his friends would all end up dead after everything was complete. At least that would mean no witnesses to this embarrassment.

**That’s the attitude you need. Kill Potter.**

Great.

As the weeks passed, Voldemort had been spending more and more time attempting to hang out with and befriend Potter. It was not going very well, usually ending with one of Potter’s friends threatening to hex him to pieces or Potter awkwardly sidling away. That was why it was so surprising when, one day, the Boy Who Lived decided to approach Malfoy for once and ask him ‘what was up’.

Voldemort blinked at him for a second, trying to decipher the modern slang. Eventually, he decided on an answer and slowly raised his hand to point at the ceiling, assuming that Potter had simply forgotten his basic directions.

_ No, no, no! That isn’t- _

Nope. He gave up. There was simply no dealing with the dark lord when he was controlling your body.

***

“You… what?”

Trapped inside of his own mind, Draco screamed. This was not happening. Absolutely not. Not this piece of scum, please,  _ Merlin _ .

“My manor is very big, and you do not have parents. Your current residence will not be as good as my own,” Voldemort said. “Therefore, you will come this Christmas.”

With that, he turned away and headed back to the common room.

_ I don’t want him at my house! _

**Silence, Draco. We need an easy way to kill him. This is the simplest.**

_ There is no way he is going to agree. _

**Fool.**

But the voice was less confident, and Draco wondered for a moment whether this meant he was growing closer to the genocidal wizard.

Gross. Nope. Not doing that.

_ I’m just saying that Potter would never visit me. _

***

“Do pass the chicken,” Draco’s mother smiled, the expression tight and anxious.

How the hell had this happened?

“Of course, mother,” Voldemort said stiffly, and pushed the plate over. It scraped against the smooth wood somehow, truly reflecting the completely uncomfortable atmosphere in the dining room. Draco’s parents mostly kept exchanging looks and wincing everytime Voldemort spoke. Harry had been sat in silence for the entire meal, only speaking when spoken to and generally enjoying the meal more than the company. Occasionally, he would cast a suspicious glance over at Draco, and Voldemort would send him an unnerving smile that would make the dark haired boy quickly return his gaze to his food.

Draco almost felt sorry for him.

Hey, at least it was the last day of all of this. After this, Harry would be dead, and he would once again be able to live in his own body.

Wait.

Harry would be  _ dead _ .

As much as he hated to admit it - which was a lot, really - he had grown a little attached to the other teen. Sure, he still didn’t like him, but at least he was far more genuine than his other friends. And - Merlin, he had ended up trying to be friends, and that counted for something, right?

Killing him… ending his entire life…

It didn’t seem right.

**Are you getting cold feet now? Don’t do so, Draco. We have come so far.**

_ I don’t know. Do we have to kill him? Can we not just… Obliviate him or something? _

**Do you think I grew to my current power by sparing lives that didn’t deserve to remain? By showing mercy? Don’t be a fool.**

Draco silenced his thoughts and watched, a slight plan forming in his head. Maybe, just  _ maybe _ , he could commit one act of slight kindness for the first time in his sixteen years of life.

As Voldemort talked to Harry about something to do with snakes, Draco focused on his thoughts, trying to separate them completely from Voldemort’s, to keep them away. He needed his body back  _ fast _ .

They arrived in the room, and Harry entered cautiously, hand discreetly going to his back pocket. Voldemort - and, by extension, Draco - noticed immediately.

**Ha.**

Draco hated hearing these thoughts. He  _ hated  _ it, so, so much. And he was going to make them leave, with just a little more concentration.

Just a little -

**No.**

His thoughts were dispersed by Voldemort’s colder and darker presence, and he almost yelled. If only he had a mouth.

**Can you not wait a few minutes?** Voldemort sounded irritable.  **We are so close to success.**

And then, a boon was granted to Draco. And Harry, he supposed.

Somehow, Harry had slipped up and accidentally said a sentence in Parseltongue, no doubt due to the subject of the conversation. As he was about to go to correct himself, Voldemort answered in Parseltongue almost naturally.

Harry froze, his mouth wide open, and several little lights seemed to light up in his mind at once. “Luna was right!”

With that, he drew his wand and fired a spell at Voldemort.

_ Please don’t be Expelliarmius, please don’t be - oh Merlin. _

It was Expelliarmius.

Either way, it managed to distract Voldemort for long enough to allow Draco to step in and take back actual control of his mind. Harry then fired again, this time Stunning him - finally, that stupid boy - and his vision blacked out.

***

When he woke up, Harry was squinting at him, wand pointed as if it was any defence against an actual  _ dark lord _ .

“God, what an idiot,” Draco muttered, and then paused. Wait, that was his own voice! And Voldemort’s was gone, his mind completely removed from Draco’s brain. This was great. “He’s gone! He - oh thank Merlin!”

Harry blinked at him. “What?”

“Voldemort.”

And, for some reason, Harry seemed to understand what he meant. “Oh. Good. Um. How much have you been in control for the past few months?”

“He’s been here since September,” Draco deadpanned, pushing himself up and falling back down almost straight away. He had not done anything physical in months, of course he could barely move.

“Well, that explains a lot then,” Harry said thoughtfully. “He really isn’t good at social interaction, is he?”

“Nope.”

Folding his arms, Harry grinned. “Back to enemies, then?”

“Sounds just perfect to me.”

\---

“What even happened at his house?” Ron asked once Harry had announced that Draco would no longer be spending any time.

“Well, it’s a long story-”

“Draco obviously freed himself from Voldemort and decided to go back to his old way of dealing with Harry,” Luna smiled, and returned to her edition of the Quibbler.

Ron stared at the younger girl. “Wh-?”

“Okay, what  _ really  _ happened?” Hermione said, looking exasperated.

“Actually, pretty much that,” Harry replied, a small grin on his face. “I prefer it this way, frankly.”

His friends all stopped to gape at him, with the exception of Luna.

Ron responded first. “What the-?”

**Author's Note:**

> ahahahaha i hope you enjoyed! please drop a kudos or comment if you did! thanks for reading!


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